"But what about animal rights?" I asked at the end of last night's debate between Barack Obama and JoHN McCain.

Everyone else in the room jumped on me.

Didn't I realise that we were facing the worst economic crisis since The Depression? Couldn't I understand that there were more important things than animals and their putative rights?

No, I couldn't. I can't. I don't. We are all animals. The economy isn't an animal, but you and I definitely are. (Unless you're a vegetable, or a mineral, in which case I'm wondering how you can read this) We are the economy. We are all in this together. But it wasn't the four-legged animals who caused this economic melt-down. It was the two-legged ones, the human animals.

I'll bet you all the money in the world that not a single one of the smarmy, smart-ass wheelers and dealers who profited from this financial fiasco owns a dog. You have to care for a dog, feed it, take it for walks. These people don't have time to care about anybody or anything except themselves and their golden parachutes. Maybe their kids have dogs, but I'll bet they don't know the dogs' names. I wouldn't be surprised if some of them don't even know their kids' names. Or how many houses they own, but that's another story.

How we treat animals is important. People who abuse animals abuse humans. People who don't care about animals often don't care about people, either. I want a President who cares about animals. John McCain seems indifferent. Sarah Palin shoots wolves from a helicopter. The ASPCA backs Barack Obama. I know where my vote is going.